The Music Man
The Music Man (homo musica) sits on his own, with enormous reality-excluding headphones (typically only “Skull Candy” brand will do), meaning that in the event of a fire he’s likely to burn to death before hearing the alarms, sirens, screams, and crackling of his own flesh. He sits quietly, wiggling gently to a beat only he can hear, like a rhythmic Parkinson sufferer, transported into a musical wonderland of his very own. Occasionally he’ll burst into one or two words of song before returning to the good natured silence he usually dwells in. Scientists have never witnessed this specimen entering or leaving the bus, and there is speculation that he appears by spontaneous generation wherever the local rhythm allows.